Castle Vanian Halloween Special: Scary Scarecrows: Scarecrows (1988)

 What did you think of Scarecrows?

Scarecrows (1988) is a good, fast film that doesn’t ease up; it starts out break-neck and keeps up that speed. It’s clever because it gives you the synopsis straight away, so you know what to expect. It’s also clever because there’s always something happening. Even when they’re just standing around talking, there are things going on.

Talk to me about the production quality of Scarecrows.

Well, you’ve got to remember that it was 1988. I’ve seen a lot of these straight-to-video films that just don’t hold up. Scarecrows does. The lighting is good, and the scarecrows are also very good. Mind you... I bet the largest part of the budget was the bloody plane.

Hah. I bet it was. There weren't really a lot of CGI or big effects going on.

What is your favourite moment?

The fact that the dog made it was nice! I loved the way the scarecrows were talking to the criminals, fucking with their brains. That was good.

Okay, so talk to me about the plot.

It was simplistic, not overreached. Really, it’s just a heist movie. With killer scarecrows.

You've gotta give me more than that.

So... they’ve hijacked a plane to get away after stealing a bunch of money and one of them decides to screw the others over and make off with the cash. There’s one small plot hole there… he pushes the money out of the plane ahead of himself and finds it way too easily without a tracker. That didn’t make a whole lot of sense.

The only thing I hated was that the female mercenary – Roxanne, was it? –  had beautifully coiffed hair and was always doing her makeup. That pissed me off. I’ve known female soldiers and they didn’t give a shit about their hair. They usually had it pulled back severely or cropped short – but this was the Eighties, and it was the era of lots of makeup and big shoulder pads.

You can’t let that detract from what was a good, nervy film.

Not gonna lie… that pissed me off too.

Was there anything else you liked?

I liked that when the final girl, Kellie, made it to the plane and was getting away, she came face-to-face with her dad and he’d turned. It was almost like zombie scarecrows.

Zombie scarecrows. Thanks for the nightmares…

What are your thoughts on the dialogue?

It was believable. You had buddies and you had some that obviously hated each other. It was real. It made me wonder if half of it wasn’t scripted because it seemed so natural. If it’s scripted sometimes that kind of banter seems so phony.

I was surprised and relieved it wasn’t that sexist – which you could get a lot of in the 80s. You had the female mercenary and the kidnapped daughter but there weren’t any sexist comments or nude scenes or rape attempts and that’s rare for the time it was made. Don’t get me wrong… I loved that crap as a horny teenager in the 80s but now, as an adult watching it, it’s like, God, there’s no need for that.

Do you have a favourite character or actor?

The dog!

I liked the bald guy too. I don't remember his name but he's the one who helped Kellie get to the plane at the end. He was a bad guy, but he had some semblance of morality. A little, at least.

Any last thoughts?

I’m sure I owned this on video, but I haven’t seen it in a long time. Watching it again now, I was surprised at how well it actually held up.

A lot of times in the 80s especially, the second you got a good movie, you got another ten straight away. I like that they didn’t do that with Scarecrows. They just made a good, solid movie and left it at that.